Night terrors and potty training.

I'm tired. We are going through a rough period also known as night terrors, the very awful threes (even though she's a month off three), constant 'I wants' and general exhaustion that they don't tell you about, you know... the exhaustion that you thought wore off once they stopped teething? Yes, that exhaustion. Turns out it sticks around for much longer than you anticipate. You won't find anything about that in those dickhead 'how to' parenting books.

Everything has started to annoy me, I'm agitated and I'm losing my temper quite a lot and quite often it's with the wrong people. Sorry about that. And to make matters worse, my child is straight up refusing to have anything to do with her potty. She couldn't care less about it and even with the most magnificent bribes, she's still not budging. I've tried the right way, the patient way and my way and nothing will coax her out of those damn nappies.

I don't know what to do. I'm at the end of my tether. I'm going to wait another month and try again.

I've read up on night terrors and nightmares until I've gone cross-eyed, she seems to alternate between the two and every night ends up in my bed and I start the day on broken sleep which, regardless of how many hours of broken sleep, is a recipe for disaster and often results in a very unproductive day. The amount of TV she watches has been reduced, she doesn't have her ipad anymore (only for long journeys) and she doesn't have anything sugary after 2pm. She goes to bed around 7.30 and for the first three - four hours she sleeps very well but as soon as I get into bed it all kicks off. I just don't know what to do about it - see a doctor? Cut out sugar completely? Am I doing something wrong?

If you've had experience in this, please let me know how you went about making it better. She doesn't wake in the night (if she does, she goes straight back to sleep) but she tosses and turns quite a bit. I'm really starting to lose my sanity over her sleep.

11 comments:

  1. I have no experience in any of this, but I think the best way to deal with the potty training is not to rush it if she's not interested. Maybe start gently telling her that big girls don't wear nappies? Who knows, not me I'm afraid!

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  2. Eve had night terrors and when we changed something they stopped, but I am so tired that I cannot think what the hell it was. I promise I will rack my brains and figure it out.
    She's still a godawful sleeper though,kicking and hitting I may actually end up insane from it.
    Sugary stuff make no difference to Eve behaviour but cutting out all preservatives and artificial colours (as well as caramel additives - that's to do with her allergy though) has made a huge difference. Much less aggression and meltdowns, it's hard as anything but has really been worth it for us.
    Sending you so much sympathy, hugs and the hope that you get real sleep soon. xx

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    1. Thanks for the tip! It's so hard, isn't it? It's scary to watch but so bloody exhausting. x

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  3. India is the same with nappies! And if I have one more bloody know-it-all tell me how 'wrong' it is, I'm going to swing for them. Kids are kids, not robots programmed to do everything at the same time. It's probably why India can count to 25 and colour almost perfectly in the lines age 2, whilst some other 2 year olds can't ;) ARGH! Sorry, rant over.
    Big hugs for you all though on the night terrors though, that's hard. Never been there with any of my 3, so no advice, just a virtual hug!

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    1. I welcome advice but when family keep asking when she's going to be potty trained... yeah because I can just click my fingers! I'm just going to try once a month until she finally gets it and hope she isn't 18 by the time she does! Thank you xxx

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  4. We are at the same stage with the night time sleep. It's all gone a bit erratic and bubba wakes up, gets out of bed and stays awake for hours afterwards saying she is worried & 'dreaming bad'. It's still a work in progress but my mum hit on a brilliant (it's working for now) solution. She got a big cuddly dog (my girl likes dogs) and said he was there to protect bubba in the night if she wakes up. If she is worried then she needs to cuddle 'cuddles' the dog and try to sleep. So far it's working and we have had three nights of sleep in a row. She admitted today that she woke once last night and gave cuddles a squeeze and he helped her sleep again after a bad dream.

    On the potty front, bubba turns three next week and is only just out of nappies. She was dead against the idea and would cry if you mentioned anything other than nappies. I left it a month and she then thought it was her idea, she wanted to try. She was dry day and night within three days.

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    1. That's a brilliant idea - thanks so much for sharing! I keep talking about the potty to her in the hope she'll just one day go - fingers crossed! x

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  5. Hey love. I have no advice about the night terrors I'm afraid, but we had the same problems with the potty training. I tried once last year, once again in January and gave up both times because it just wasn't happening and everyone was getting narky. We just stuck her in pull-ups and then left her to it to work it out herself (crossing our fingers). She literally won't do ANYTHING I tell her to at the moment, so why would potties be any different?! Last week the nursery tried her in knickers for the day, and since then we haven't looked back. Waiting until they're ready is the best/easiest option I think, and if that's the summer for Lil then so be it, it'll be easier then anyway. (The ridiculously massive bribe of a trip to Peppa Pig World once she was fully done may have helped too)

    I think its definitely worth only dealing with one thing at a time, so forget about nappies for a bit and concentrate on getting yourself some more sleep asap!

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    1. Thank you for your advice, I think she'll have it by the summer but we'll see. Last summer was a failure but she totally gets it now so she might want to run around the garden butt naked and decide that that's the right time for her. Here's hoping! xxx

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  6. For the nappies issue I agree that every child is different and will want to do it a different times. Summertime is better for potty training though just because they are not in so many layers when they have an accident. For my little boy a big thing about potty training was that he got to have 'big boy pants'... perhaps a shopping trip will help, especially if Lil likes Disney princess there are loads of them out there! Also a friend of mine used to have a little potty for her little girls dolls and they would role play (not exactly a normal tea party but if it helps lol!)

    My little boy does suffer from the odd nightmare and used to get them alot more when he was smaller. I think most children go through it at this age but I agree with Karen. Jack had a large teddy he was given when he was born and it used to be a bit big to be in bed with him so we sit it on the end of his bed. Then when he was having nightmares big teddy used to come into bed with Jack to protect him. I think all they need is a little bit of comfort. First few times we would have to go in and get teddy for him but now its very rare he'll need us at all.

    I don't know if the 2 are linked though as whne Jack was night potty training he would have a nightmare to wake him up because he needed a wee. I think it was his bodies way of telling him to get up to wee. He still does it sometimes.. he wakes up crying but doesnt know why, we will take him to the loo, he has a wee and all of sudden he's all better. Sometimes this is done and he is actually completely asleep the entire time (which is soooo creepy!).

    Hope my random mumblings help you a bit x

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    1. Ugh - have tried the whole pants thing. She doesn't want to wear them, just look at the princesses on them. What a fail, little monkey! I agree with the summer, hopefully it'll click. Perhaps it is linked, I've stopped talking about it for the last week and she hasn't had a terror so you may well be onto something!

      Thank you for all your advice xx

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