Shit* she says...

*'Stuff' just didn't sound right.

'Where are the keys mummy?'
'What keys?'
'The keys'
'Why, where are you going'
'Co-op to buy chocolate egg and wine.'

'I lick the wall'
'No, don't lick the wall'
'I lick it' *licks the wall*
'I'm not going to keep telling you: you must not lick the wall'
'I lick it' *licks wall again*
'That makes Mummy sad'
'Sorry mummy, I love you' *licks the wall*

'Look Mummy, horse' *sits on dog*
'Monty isn't a horse, Lil'
'I horse ride'
'Get off the dog'
'Me ride the horsey' *Dog sits there*
'Lil, get off now otherwise he will cry'
*laughs and hits the dog on the head*

'Where's my wine?'
'You don't have wine Lil'
'Where is it?'
'You have juice'
'I want wine'

'Me lick wall'
'I lick it'
'That's dirty'
'I do it'
'Don't do it'
*licks wall*

'What would you like for dinner?'
'No, you are not having chocolate for dinner. If you eat all your dinner then you can have some for pudding. What would you like for dinner?'

'I lick wall'
'No Lil, don't lick the wall'
*licks floor*

So now you see why I drink so much.


  1. Why do they like licking things? Drives me mad....

  2. Brilliant!! I'm also glad to see that it's not only Henry who completely terrorises our poor dog! Henry always licks the bath when he's in it's like they're mentally deranged!


  3. Actual laughing. LOTS.


  4. Haha, both me and the other half found this hilarious! There are certain things that only children can say and still be cute.

  5. Lick the wall .. love it! The things I have to look forward to in a year or two :)

  6. Oh god this made me laugh Charlotte!! I am amazed you have held on to your marbles, bloody well done! Yeepers :)

    Kate x
    Just Pirouette and Carry On...