Leave me alone.

It's four fucking thirty and I've lost my mind. All I can think about is wine and bedtime. I want to quit.

Yes, we are right in the middle of the terrible two's, waist deep in shitty moods and screaming and occasional hitting and pure rage. And that's just her. Every day I sit and google flights to Ibiza and New York and hope that I win the Euromillions so I can just fuck off on my own and have some space. I want to scream. MUMMY MUMMY MUMMY I WANT THIS I WANT THAT MUMMY MUMMY MUMMY.


My head feel fuzzy and my brain hurts from trying to keep her occupied while I work and try to find us a new home as well as researching nurseries and child minders and praying to the house gods that someone snaps this one up pronto before I really lose it and end up being carted off by the mental police.

I want to cry. Sob all over the place and smash plates and then go to sleep for a thousand years. Why is two such a hard age? She's turned in to a monster, a gob foaming, screaching monster. And I just can't be bothered with it most of the time. That's awful isn't it?

WORDS OF WISDOM SOMEBODY, PLEASE. It gets better once they hit three, riiiiiiight?


  1. Soooo much better when they're 3. This is a phase, which isn't being made easier with the move, the new business and child care. It's just too much going on at the moment. Good luck, and let me know when I can visit and take her off your hands xx

  2. It does get better! I can totally relate -as much as I really love her -my eldest was hard work too (hence why I fled back to work..!) There is so much going on at the moment so it's no surprise that both you and her are a little unsettled. Hope all the plans go smoothly and that Lil chills out a bit xx

  3. It sounds bloody awful at the moment but the simplest thing I ever did was when my three year old was screaming at me, shouting at me for everything and nothing. I ignored him. It sounds so unbelievabley simple, but its incredibley hard. Especially when the said devil-child is ripping your house apart. Ignore her. She is not in pain, ill or scared. She just wants attention and while she screams and pleads it's all for attention. While your trying to placate her. She's given what she wants more attention. Ignore the bad. praise the normal good beahviour. Takes a few weeks that will test you, and very nearly sent me to the edge of drink...