Week 27

It's amazing what a difference a tan makes. After a week in Ibiza, I felt pretty chilled out and less stabby which is always good. Except now that feeling has gone and I'm back to grumpy.

I've really started to embrace my changing shape although I'm still not so completely comfortable with the weight gain (on my legs especially) but I keep reminding myself it isn't forever. And anyway, it'll be cold when this little one arrives so I'll be able to hide the post pregnancy bulge in baggy jumpers. Cut me some slack, I'm as vain as the next person.

Movements are increasingly stronger and I've had some pretty violent kicks that have been quite uncomfortable and have been sure an arm or leg is going to appear out of my vagina sooner than it should. That's a very strong baby I'm carrying. Heavy and strong.

I haven't had much to grumble about EXCEPT for the excrutiating back pain (although I'm generally grumbly at the moment, UGH). Getting comfortable takes a while and I know it's only going to get worse as time goes on but it's not bothering me to the point of tears, yet. I've been wearing a sexy SPD belt to try and relieve the pressure but it isn't helping with the pain.

Pregnancy exhaustion has reared it's ugly head again and I'm also anaemic so I've been glugging floradix like wine (barf) and have made the relevant changes to my diet. Yawn.

Whilst on holiday, I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and had my eyes opened to so many amazing births. Before my appointment to discuss Lil's birth at 16 weeks, I walked into that room adamant I was having an ELCS this time. After leaving the room I wasn't so sure but after reading her book I am now preparing to discuss and plan a birth in the birthing centre at my hospital. This kind of birth isn't normally available for women who have had a previous section but I can't let this go, it's something I feel really passionate about after reading that book and I have a supportive SOM on my side. I wish I'd have known about it when I was pregnant the first time round, I'd like to think things would have ended differently but I can only use my experience and what I've learnt to change how this one will turn out.

I've had a couple of anxiety attacks this week and have wanted to crawl under a rock. I can't put my finger on the cause but it certainly isn't the baby. Maybe it's Lil starting school, who knows, but I'm hoping they were just random ones.

Clothes. Still not much of an improvement on the shopping front although I was quite pleased with the bits I took on holiday. I've been scouring ebay too and have found some amazing maternity bargains.

Hopefully by next week the irritable grump cloud will lift and I'll find my sense of humour again (it's probably hiding at the bottom of the huge ironing pile that isn't getting done... COUGH COUGH DEAR HUSBAND).